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The Secret of Paradise

This is a short story written by Emma Lairson. The challenge was to write a story incorporating these words: Sunday, secret, wallpaper, swap, sister, curiosity, island, notebook, marathon, demand.

I step off the private plane and into a tropical paradise. The island has belonged to our family since my grandfather was a young boy. Since passing away last Sunday, the family decided to have a week-long get together in memory of grandpa.

I take in the warm breeze, tropical plants, and the giant fucking mansion before me. It seems that our family is the first to arrive judging by the lack of planes.

Grandpa had four children and those children gave him eleven grandchildren.

“Gorgeous. I haven’t been here since my twenty-first birthday,” my sister comments.

“You mean when you and your friends completely trashed the place?” I ask, wryly. “You ruined grandpa’s favorite wallpaper,” I add.

“Whatever,” she grumbles, “Lane thought there was a secret message behind it.”

“Lane,” I mumble.

Lane is my sister’s longest friend and an absolute menace. She can be a nice girl but she is a bit of a bubble brain and her curiosity gets the best of her.

Our parents disembark from the plane and we walk up to the front door as a united front. The door is unlocked and as Mom opens it, I come to the realization that we are not the first ones here, as a projectile flies through the air and lands at my feet. Looking down, I see that it is an actual banana peel.

“What the hell, Brayden?” my mother shouts.

“Sorry, Aunt Clara, I didn’t see you.”

This prompts Mom to throw her body at my twenty-two-year-old cousin, forcing the back of his shirt up and over his head, covering his vision. This is just the way my mother’s family acts. My father has tried to force my mother to change her ways but she doesn’t do “demands” and my father loves her just the way she is now.

Sloane joins our mother while my father and I make our way to the kitchen. We always tend to congregate there every time we are together. We find my uncle Remy standing over the stove while his teenage daughter scribbles furiously in her notebook in the breakfast nook.

I sidle over to Reese, my cousin, “How are you?” I ask.

Reese mumbles something, looks up and then smiles at me.

“Hey, cuz, I’m just writing in the journal that I share with my friends. We start with our own and then swap with another person until we get our original journal back.”

“That’s a cute idea,” I muse.

Reese returns to her journal while I zero in on my father and uncle’s conversation. I don’t even bother to stay when I catch them talking about the recent marathon Remy completed. I meander around the house, looking for memories in grandpa’s knickknacks.

I pause next to the mantel over the fireplace, taking in the picture he has of us in greater detail. I go to pick it up but it seems stuck. I pull forward and hear a click and thud before the mantel and fireplace swing inward. No one comes running and I don’t call out. I want to find out what this house is hiding on my own first.

Walking down a long hallway, that is oddly clean and lit, I come to a staircase spiraling down. Carefully making my way down, I step off the last step and in front of a door. I sigh, knowing I don’t have a key. I still give the handle a twist and to my surprise, the door opens.

Inside is a spacious living area and sitting on the couch is an older woman. She whips her head to me as the door opens and I gasp.

“Grandma?! We thought you were dead?!”

McCrea’s Caramels

  1. Dark Roasted Mocha- It smells like coffee, is not super soft and granuley. I am not someone who enjoys coffee-flavored things, aside from actual coffee, but this isn’t a super overwhelming flavor. I still didn’t quite like it, 2 stars.
  2. Deep Chocolate- Its scent is very chocolatey (no surprise) and almost tastes like a brownie. I give it 4 stars.
  3. Ginger Fusion- This caramel has an odd smell with a bit of a kick. It tastes almost fruity and I liked it until I didn’t anymore. As a ginger-hater, I give it 2 stars.
  4. Ginger Fusion- Repeat, 2 stars.
  5. Deep Chocolate- Repeat, 4 stars.
  6. Cinnamon Clove- The scent of this caramel is more clove than cinnamon and has an almost pumpkin spice-esque taste to it. Not too bad, 3 stars.
  7. Chocolate Peppermint- This smells just like the name and tastes like a thin mint, however the mint isn’t overpowering. I quite enjoyed this one, 5 stars.
  8. Deep Chocolate- Repeat, 4 stars.
  9. Cinnamon Clove- Repeat, 3 stars.
  10. Cape Cod Sea Salt- It tastes like a traditional caramel. No extra notes, 4 stars.
  11. Cape Cod Sea Salt- Repeat, 4 stars.
  12. Anisette- I don’t quite understand this as a flavor but it is quite popular around the holidays. It smells like a tea, licorice, and flowers, while tasting like black licorice. I actually enjoyed this flavor, 4 stars.
  13. Black Lava Sea Salt- This has a good caramel flavor but I was not a fan of the chunks. The added texture brought the rating down, 2 stars.
  14. Black Lava Sea Salt- Repeat, 2 stars.
  15. Rosemary Truffle Sea Salt- It smells weird and I don’t think truffle should be in a caramel. Just the name of it turns me away, 1 star.
  16. Tapped Maple- All I know is that this flavor is not for me. No other explanation, 2 stars.
  17. Tapped Maple- Repeat, 2 stars.
  18. Chocolate Peppermint- Repeat, 5 stars.
  19. Rosemary Truffle Sea Salt- Repeat, 1 star.
  20. Classic Vanilla- A good, solid taste. You can’t go wrong with this flavor, 5 stars.
  21. Classic Vanilla- Repeat, 5 stars.
  22. Anisette- Repeat, 4 stars.
  23. Cafe Noir- This was an immediate no just from smell alone. It tastes like espresso and I do not like coffee unless it is in a mug or martini glass. This is definitely not for me, 1 star.
  24. Dark Roasted Mocha- Repeat, 2 stars.

Harry Potter Jelly Bean Advent

The Artful Dodger

Crossing Swords

12 Days of Scented Candles

Walt Disney’s Short Circuit

Puddles: 5/5

Exchange Student: 4/5

Lucky Toupee: 4/5

Just A Thought: 4/5

Cycles: 5/5

Lightning In A Bottle: 5/5

The Race: 4/5

Hair-Jitsu: 4/5

Downtown: 3/5

Jing Hua: 5/5

Drop: 4/5

Zenith: 5/5

Elephant In the Room: 4/5

Fetch: 5/5

Crosswalk: 5/5

Going Home: 5/5

No. 2 to Kettering: 4/5

Dinosaur Barbarian: 3/5

Songs To Sing In the Dark: 5/5

Reflect: 4/5

Burman’s Hot Sauce Advent

It’s that time of year again so here are my thoughts on Aldi’s hot sauce advent calendar. Keep in mind that I am not much of a hot sauce person and don’t have much of a tolerance. The bottles that the sauce came in are not full size and about as big as the mini Tabasco sauces.

  1. Sriracha hot sauce – I found this to have too much of a vinegar taste, not being very thick, and while it was hot, it was bearable. 1/5 stars
  2. Jalapeño hot sauce – This sauce tasted like banana peppers and was initially spicy but was over quickly. 4/5 stars
  3. Green hot sauce – It tasted similar to the jalapeño but wasn’t as tasty. 3/5 stars
  4. Mango Habanero hot sauce – I thought this sauce was hotter than the others and I didn’t quite like the taste. 2/5 stars
  5. Smoked Chipotle hot sauce – The name describes the way the sauce tasted. 2/5 stars
  6. Yellow hot sauce – What even is this? This was too hot I couldn’t really discern the taste. 1/5 stars
  7. Chocolate Chipotle hot sauce – GROSS. 1/2 star
  8. Garlic hot sauce – This had quite the garlic flavor. 2/5 stars
  9. Cajun hot sauce – Nope. 1/5 stars
  10. Extreme hot sauce – There is no taste, just REALLY HOT. 1/5 stars
  11. Sweet Chipotle hot sauce – I found this sauce to have a mesquite-type of flavor and it was spicy. 3/5 stars
  12. Red hot sauce – There was almost no taste and was really spicy then cools down. 2/5 stars
  13. Sweet Habanero hot sauce – This tastes almost exactly like the red hot sauce. 2/5 stars
  14. Chipotle hot sauce – This sauce tastes exactly like sweet chipotle but a hint sweeter. 3/5 stars
  15. Smoked Garlic hot sauce – I didn’t think this was spicy or hot but it did have a good flavor. 4/5 stars
  16. Red Pepper hot sauce – This was immediately spicy and didn’t have a very great flavor. 2/5 stars
  17. Garlic Herb hot sauce – It was really salty and didn’t have much of a garlic taste. 2/5 stars
  18. Ghost Pepper hot sauce – Absolutely not. 1/5 stars
  19. Green Pepper hot sauce – Not bad. 3/5 stars
  20. Habanero hot sauce – It tastes just like the other habanero hot sauce. 2/5 stars
  21. Thai Sweet Chili hot sauce – This was too hot with not enough flavor. 1/5 stars
  22. Whiskey Habanero hot sauce – This one also tastes just like the other habanero sauces. 1/5 stars
  23. Smokey Bourbon hot sauce – It smelled smokey but that didn’t transfer to the flavor. 1/5 stars
  24. Smoked Jalapeño hot sauce – I found that this tasted just like bell peppers. 3/5 stars
  25. Red Chili hot sauce – This was really hot and had no real flavor. 1/5 stars

This review is just my opinion, you may end up liking what I didn’t. This might be helpful to others like me who are curious but don’t necessarily like hot sauce.

Bonne Maman Advent Calendar

This advent calendar features twenty-four jams. I am a novice in this area so if you are an expert in this food category, please take my opinion with a grain of salt.

  1. White Nectarine-Peach-Lemon Verbana smells like tea and tastes like a sweet black tea. It tastes decent on toast. 3/5
  2. Strawberry-Linden Blossom is sweet, almost too sweet and doesn’t really taste like strawberry. 3/5
  3. Apricot-Banana is a no-go for me. 1/5
  4. Cherry-Pink Peppercorn has absolutely no taste. You would think there would be at least a hint of the peppercorn since it is such a strong flavor. 1/5
  5. Fig-Cardamom is a NO. 0/5
  6. Grapefruit-Dragon Fruit gave me high hopes but ended up being disappointing. 1/5
  7. Raspberry-Dark Chocolate absolutely befuddled my mind. I could not seem to reconcile chocolate with raspberry jam. 2/5
  8. Peach-Jasmine Flower was just as confusing as it sounds. 1/5
  9. Honey is not my favorite and do not like it unless it is in tea. 2/5
  10. Lemon-Yuzu was almost sour but had no real defining taste. 1/5
  11. Apricot-Lavender had a subtle lavender flavor but I could not taste the apricot. 3/5
  12. Wild Blueberry-Balm Leaves is such a big name for a flavor but it didn’t really stand out like it should. 2/5
  13. Caramel-Cinnamon tastes like straight-up caramels. I didn’t really taste cinnamon but that’s okay with me. 5/5
  14. Cherry-Hibiscus Flower was a bit tart but not terrible, though I didn’t like the texture. 3/5
  15. Mirabelle Plum-Spice almost reminded me of cinnamon applesauce. 3/5
  16. Orange-Guava Lime smells like guava but I’m not a fan of the taste. 2/5
  17. Peach-Mint is a no, thank you. 1/5
  18. Pineapple-Ginger tastes like baby food. I detest ginger but this didn’t have that soapy taste to it. 1/5
  19. Strawberry-Guava reminds me of a sponge cake. 4/5
  20. Quince is a weird texture and not much of a discernible taste, just sweet. 1/5
  21. Rhubarb-Strawberry almost doesn’t taste like anything specific. 2/5
  22. Orange-Mandarin-Passion Fruit was alright though I mostly taste the mandarin and I didn’t like the texture. 2/5
  23. Mango-Raspberry-Lime has too many flavors trying to battle it out on my taste buds. 1/5
  24. Cherry-Christmas Spice is sweet then tart. 1/5

Aldi’s Cheese Advent Calendar

  1. Extra Mature Cheddar- This is a white cheese, not a soft cheese (almost crumbly), and tastes like a really good sharp cheddar. 5/5
  2. Black Pepper Gouda- It has almost no taste but the occasional peppery flavor. Even still, I enjoyed this mild cheese. 3/5
  3. Smoky Cheddar (Mimolette Cheese)- This tastes like it says. It makes me think of a smoked meat. 3/5
  4. Spiced Apple Cheddar- I’m going to need to buy this in a larger size because this tastes and smells like stuffing. 5/5
  5. Aged Gouda- A very mild, but classic cheese. 4/5
  6. Cheddar with Whiskey- This cheese almost has a strawberry taste to me. It’s not quite crumbly but not totally soft either. 4/5
  7. Cheddar with Port Wine- A marbled cheese that doesn’t really have the port wine flavor but it is a decent cheddar. 4/5
  8. Goat Cheese- Not a whole lot of flavor, but what flavor there is, tastes like I’m eating a goat. 1/5
  9. Black Truffle Cheddar- A harder cheese that tastes similar to most other truffle-flavored foods. 3/5
  10. Mustard Gouda- A very interesting and delightful flavor with hints of spices while still managing to have a faint mustard taste. 4/5
  11. Sweet English Cheddar- This is exactly what it says it is and I don’t know how to explain it any better. 5/5
  12. Spiced Apple Cheddar- Repeat. 5/5
  13. Mustard Gouda- This is a repeat. 4/5
  14. Mimolette- An orange cheese that starts out smoky then turns bitter. 1/5
  15. Cheddar with Whiskey- This is a white cheese, hard and crumbly with a heavy whiskey flavor. 3/5
  16. Smoky Cheddar- Repeat. 3/5
  17. Black Pepper Gouda- Repeat. 3/5
  18. Cheddar with Port Wine- This is a repeat. 4/5
  19. Extra Mature Cheddar- Repeat. 5/5
  20. Sweet English Cheddar- Repeat. 5/5
  21. Mimolette- Repeat. 1/5
  22. Aged Gouda- This is a repeat. 4/5
  23. Goat Cheese- This is a repeat and I didn’t bother to try it again. 1/5
  24. Black Truffle Cheddar- Repeat. 3/5